A blog from a Relationship Consultant. One that loves what he does and wants to share some of his learning experiences.
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Wednesday, March 28, 2012
I Want My Ex Back How Can I Get Them Back
I Want My Ex Back How Can I Get Them Back
So you've been on your own for a couple of weeks now and you wake up one morning with this burning thought in your mind I want my ex back! Which is a pretty normal reaction if you find that you're still in love with your ex. What is also natural is that you will find you have no real idea how to go about getting them back. So you end up looking around for help in order that you don't make a complete mess in your attempt to win them back.
Well first of all, before you go off trying to get your ex back, make sure that you're not going through the natural grieving process that comes at the end of a relationship. At the end of most relationships there is a period when the hurt and missing is so intense that it is akin to the grieving process. During this process it is very natural to have the feeling I want my ex back!and for that feeling to be all consuming.
This is because you are grieving for all the dreams and hopes you had that were wrapped up in your ex love and your ex relationship. So make real sure that you're not going through this process before you attempt to get them back.
Assuming that it is more than natural grieving, you are now ready to make good on your thought that I want my ex back! your next move should always be to figure out what went wrong.
This is important, because unless you take the time to go over the mistakes that you might have made, then getting back with your ex will only eventually lead to the same break down in the relationship as before and that will do neither of you any good. So own your mistakes and anything that you might have done wrong to contribute to the break down of the relationship.
A vital tip to remember is not to focus on what you believe your ex might have done wrong. Let them take care of their stuff for now and you take care of your own. There is time in the future for the two of you to dig around in the collective causes, but for now, you must work on your own issues and mistakes.
If you're sincerely clear that I want my ex back! then all that has been outlined is really the start that you need to take to get back with your ex and to secure a future for the two of you that will not fall into the same mistakes and pitfalls of before.
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Tuesday, March 27, 2012
How To Get Back With Your Ex When All Looks Lost
How To Get Back With Your Ex When All Looks Lost
When all looks lost and you're trying to figure out how to get back with your ex, one of the things you need to hold onto is that 95% of all relationships that look as if they're well and truly over, need not be. There is always hope, all it takes is for at least one person wanting to save the relationship and it can be saved.
The first key to figuring out how to get back with your ex is to leave your ex alone for at least a month - if at all possible longer than a month will work even better. So break all contact with them and give your ex plenty of time to think things through.
Often times in the heat of the breakup things get said and positions get taken that given time, are soon relinquished as reasoning takes over. So if you want to get to the heart of how to get back with your ex then seriously, give yourself and your ex some time.
If you don't allow for this space to think and you continue trying to push the issue to get your ex back before the time is right, then what will happen is that the more you push, the harder your ex will push back. Remember, your ex has walked out on the relationship and clearly demonstrated that they need time to think and be left alone, give them that time.
If you're worried that all looks lost because your ex is dating someone else, then you need to remember and hold onto the fact that a lot of rebound relationships just don't last. Chances are your ex is dating that person as a way to convince themselves that their relationship with you is really over. However, just because they're trying to convince themselves their relationship with you is over for good. Guess what? It doesn't mean that it is.
It is a statistical fact that rebound relationships are fraught with difficulties and very rarely work because the person on the rebound is still emotionally connected to their ex. So don't waste a whole lot of time worrying about someone your ex is currently dating.
The truth is getting your ex back is more about the two of you than anyone else,so make sure that you keep on top of your appearance, you're not doing anything to alienate your ex and that you're appearing in control and pretty soon you will have stopped wondering how to get your ex back, because they'll be back with you.
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Monday, March 26, 2012
Im Still In Love With My Ex
Im Still In Love With My Ex
If you find yourself saying, I'm still in love with my ex you aren't alone. There are many who find themselves at the end of a long term romance or marriage still clinging to hope that they might bring it back. Just because it seems like things are darkest and that there is no hope doesn't mean that there isn't any.
There is still a chance that what you had can come back even stronger. When you are saying I'm still in love with my ex and you want to get that love back it is going to have to come back stronger if it is going to last.
For those of you saying, I'm still in love with my ex you may have a desire to turn back the clock and bring back what was lost. Be careful what you ask for, you might just get it and have the same results.
Look carefully at the mistakes that was made in the past and find out not only why they were made, but why they were able to have the impact on your relationship the way they did. You need to be able to make a stronger foundation than you had before.
You are going to have to try and start from ground zero. To get back together with the one you love, you are going to have to try and start all over again. Just find a way to do it better. Tell yourself, "I'm still in love with my ex, but I want it to be better than before."
Try re-establishing a friendship. Take it slow. If your ex feels like you are trying to make things like they were, they may be resistant to it. Don't push things, just let things take their course. If the two of you are supposed to be together, it will happen. Just let it happen naturally.
Think positively about it. Don't let your ex see you crying or depressed about it. You want to try and make it look like you are a joy to come back to. If your ex sees that you are walking around depressed, they may decide that they don't want to have that in their lives. If they see that for you life has gone on and you are happy they may want to join you in your happiness.
Try to think of what type of person you would like to be with. Do you think that they would want to be with that type of person as well? People want to be with happy people who can brighten their day and make them smile. People want to be with someone who makes them feel that they have a purpose and that they aren't alone. Try to be someone that makes someone feel like that. Make your ex feel special by just being an encouraging friend.
If you make yourself valuable to your ex and are able to make them feel valuable as well, you may have a chance to bring back lost love.You may also be making a foundation that will last forever. It is a good thing to say I'm still in love with my ex, for all the right reasons.It is an even better thing to try and make the foundation of that love stronger.
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Sunday, March 25, 2012
Getting CPR For Marriage In Crisis
Getting CPR For Marriage In Crisis
A marriage in crisis is difficult to handle as it seems that what was once full of life is now suffering and on the brink of dying. When you are dating, new love seems to have a life of it's own. Everything being so new feels like a new life has begun has the two of you have started a new life together.
When you get married, it seems like everything just falls into place and everything makes sense. When times get tough, though, and and the marriage begins to struggle it can seem like the new life is starting to get old and may die out. If you aren't ready for your life together to die, your marriage in crisis may need to get C.P.R.
Get Counseling:
One of the most underutilized and overlooked opportunities for a marriage in crisis is getting marriage counseling. Marriage counseling will go a long ways towards helping you not only find resolution to your conflicts but will help the two of you find ways to grow closer together. Marriage counseling will help you be better able to understand each other.
Marriage counseling will also help you find better ways to express yourself in such a way that you don't come across as attacking each other. It could very well be, though, that one of you has some serious issues that is putting your love and relationship at risk. For those issues you may want to get therapy on your own. It may be hard to do because you will have to swallow your pride but if you are serious about saving the marriage in crisis, you will want and need to do this.
Get Perspective:
For a marriage in crisis, one of the most important thing that needs to be done is to get some perspective on what is happening. This is one area that a marriage counselor will be helpful because it will help you to look at things and situations from other perspective.
From where you are standing things may look pretty clear. However, once you are able to see from another angle, things that you couldn't understand before may make a lot of sense. Getting perspectives from other angles and vantage points will really be helpful in helping you fully understand what is happening so that you can then save the marriage in crisis.
Get Resolve:
Once you have been able to get some perspective on the crisis at hand and are getting counseling, you will have a lot of information and ideas to go off of. Those will help repair the damage that is done if you are able to act on it. Knowing is half the battle but no battle half fought was ever won.
If you see a drowning person and you not only know how to swim but know CPR and are trained in first aid, you may know everything you need to know to help save that person's life. Will that knowledge save them? Only if it is acted upon.
The same thing is true with your marriage.It just takes you acting upon it and getting resolved the issues that were killing your marriage. A marriage in crisis can only be saved if you act to make things better.
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